From the Vault - Voodoo War

Boof. A classic Ross Ahlfeld cover sketch for the conspiracy zine Refractor.

Like my War of the Worlds story Terminus, or "The Whistleblowers Episode Guide" (my TV guidebook for a show that didn't exist), the 90's zine Refractor focussed heavily on conspiracy theories...largely British ones that I would just totally make up for fun. It was generally sent out free with Holocron and other UK zines. Even pre internet/ 9-11, the conspiracy theory world was a scary place, and I received some very interesting mail while I was producing it - including a letter written on black paper in invisible ink and a cassette of stone tape recordings.

This is a column from The Collector, a sort of antiques expert for unusual items (presented as written)

Voodoo War
Almost everyone knows about the interest the World War 2 Nazi party had in black magic and religious artefacts, but surprisingly little has been made of the UKs attempts to dabble in a supernatural solution to the war.

Towards the end of 1943, a questionnaire was circulated throughout the southern counties of Great Britain. A seemingly random set of both straightforward and highly personal questions (which we would now recognise as psychometric testing) were to be answered by the entire population of these areas. While many people may have been uncomfortable with the intimate nature of the questions, the stamp "Of importance to the War Effort" ensured widespread cooperation.

The questionnaire intended to asses both the latent and highly tuned psychic abilities of the inhabitants of these areas. Southern England was chosen as the test site following a series of countrywide investigations a year previously, which charted the regularity of "strange occurences"in certain locations. The southern counties were believed to be the strongest in "natural energy" and there was a suggestion that the population seemed to amplify and exude these forces. The returned questionnaires further confirmed this hypothesis.

Of all the counties, three towns were specifically selected - sadly records do not show which - and duly their part in the war effort was explained to them. Each person was handed a small doll of Adolf Hitler and told that the doll was not only a symbol of the enemy himself, but a representation of all Germany's  tyranny. They were told to hate the doll, to keep it with them at all times, and focus any anger they might have specifically towards the effigy.

The townsfolk were also told, that on an unspecified future date, a small group of Officers and specially trained psychics would arrive. This day would be the Big Push and the dolls would be physically destroyed. None were to be deliberately physically damaged until that point.

The areas were then effectively sealed off from the rest of the UK, with all supplies and mail arriving only through army routes.

And that it would seem, is where the story ends. There are vague insubstantial rumours that Germany discovered the doll plot, and by utilising their own psychics, succeeded in animating some of the dolls, resulting in fatalities in each of the villages.

It can only be assumed that all the dolls were destroyed on that "unspecified date", which I believe is more likely to have been D-Day than the eve of the surrender. However, from time to time, moving in the circles that I do, you hear rumours of dolls having been located. Naturally these occult military items are worth a great deal of money, and I would be very grateful for any information regarding their whereabouts. But if you can't find me one, don't feel guilty...theres many more things you can help me find...

From Refractor issue 3. I drew this all by myself. No really.
Note - this was marginally funnier in 1996, when people were reading a lot more
"ancient astronaut" books. Marginally.